This morning, I, like so many others, will pack into a crowded car with other miscreants and shall make my way to the puppetry Mecca, to UNC Wilmington, the FCP National Conference. We left early. Before undertaking such a momentous journey, we breakfasted on bagels and coffee (the breakfast of champions!) And packed the car with the essentials (Yoo-hoo, junk food, puppets, and some clothing as well).
After trying unsuccessfully for an hour, I discovered that the car's visor could NOT block the glare from the top of our driver's head. For such a "momentous journey", it wasn't going very ... well, momentously. I rode shotgun. Driving, was "lean, mean" Nick Frasher. In the backseat rode "Battlin" Barbara Frasher and "Mom" Paula Manley. We also pulled the Frasher's trailer. You see, the Frasher's are also going to teach classes this year, and Ms. Barbara sells puppets in the conference store. Thus, we had a LOT of stuff to tow. Well, almost six hours later, my fellow journeyers (Is that even a word?) And I arrived at Mecca, the University of North Carolina.
Oops! We got there a day early. No, actually we were signed up for "Early Bird" registration because the Frashers are staff and needed to be there early to help with setting up. Well, unless you want to read about the tedium of the next twenty-six hours, I'll skip to tomorrow night.
Being the upstanding citizen I am, I helped the new arrivals with their luggage. I even got a tip; one guy gave me a can of Surge cola. Pay attention, this is important later. I met with friends from previous conferences and let the time tick by until the evening's first performance.
Every morning I would awaken unbearably early, still tired from going to bed unquestionably late. Then I would go to the cafeteria to have some of the best chow this side of McDonald's. Even if the food wasn't the greatest, we had interesting shows. Take for example, the infamous mime Don Mullins. He has performed all over and even once studied under Marcel Marceau. However, his best performances were in the dining hall. For instance, a cheerleading camp started halfway through the week, and they shared our dining hall. Well, Don jumped up and shouted "We've got spirit, yes we do, we've got spirit how 'bout you?" Then the cheerleaders (about a hundred of 'em) jumped up and did the same thing. Then, the entire FCP side jumped up and shouted while Don Mullins did a cartwheel down the aisle. When questioned, his only response was, "I've always wanted to be a cheerleader." Really cool guy. Loud for a mime, though.
The best Mullins stunt was after evening performances, in front of the
FCP store. Don hollowed out a giant stuffed bear and contorted himself
inside of it. He sat there on the couch, immobile, and everyone thought
he was just a bear. Well, we just about wet ourselves when the bear began
to dance around in his seat. 
Well, after breakfast we would go to morning worship where we gather,
praise God, and find out that the mealtimes have been changed. After that,
everyone breaks up and goes to classes. They offer all sorts of classes.
Puppetry classes, clowning classes, mime classes, prop building, puppet
building, interpretative dance and so on. Throughout the week eight classes
are offered. I took three. The other five I spent with Nick Frasher helping
him teach his performance classes. I took "Storytelling with Balloons"
where the clowns, Graham Cracker and J.A.M. (Dressed as if they were normal
people), taught us how to use long twistie balloons (2600's for those in
the know) to tell stories on stage, including "The Good Samaritan"
and "Jonah and the Whale". Being the balloon aficionado that
I am, I also took "Advanced Ballooning" with Terry Whittington
where we learned how to make such masterpieces (After they pop, they become
"many pieces") as the infamous "big funny hat". I also
took a prop-making class with Dave Privett. 
Well, since he helped pay my way to the conference and because he needed
my immense expertise so badly (Deep Sarcasm), I agreed to help Mr. Nick
in his performance classes. He taught two classes, each two sessions long,
and another class on Friday morning for rehearsal. You see, in these classes
we teach a group of puppeteers the words and choreography to a song and
then perform in front of the entire conference Friday afternoon. Friday
morning both classes met onstage to practice a few times before performing.
One song was done entirely in blacklight. Blacklight is a special type
of lighting that allows only certain colors and materials to show up. Thus,
in blacklight, the puppeteers could move around, completely invisible,
and the puppets would appear to float in mid-air. The other song was more
traditional puppetry. He did a great job teaching the classes and the performances
went off without a hitch.
Well, after morning classes comes lunch. After lunch, everyone goes
back to the auditorium for "Top Gun", where two teams perform
for an hour each. That's also where they tell us that the mealtimes have
been changed. After that, they offer afternoon activities. Of course, the
really die-hard puppeteers like myself HATED this, because in past years
they offered classes in the afternoon. This year, they gave you time to
go to the BEACH or to take a NAP. Some people even went to a MOVIE! You
come here to learn. You're not supposed to have fun! Then, we go to dinner
for more delicious cuisine. Then, we go to evening performances and find
out that the meals have been changed again. However, the WAY they tell
us is a tad more interesting. You see, this year the conference has a military
theme. So, set up off to one side of the stage is a Jeep-shaped puppet
stage. Inside, Major Announcement and General Information perform little
routines to tell us what the announcements are. Also, they have "Private
Gerbert". If you don't know, Gerbert is a famous puppet and has had
his own show on the Christian networks and on the Family Channel. However,
halfway through the week Major Announcement (Dave Privett) caught a bit
of a cold and lost his voice. No problem, though. Major Announcement came
up with tape across his mouth holding signs. The signs said, "Are
you ready for tonight's announcements?", "I can't hear you!"
and "You people are pathetic!" The performances themselves were
good too. Various clown troupes, puppet teams, and mimes performed, some
professional, some just for the sake of ministry.
Well, four days and about ten hours of sleep later, Friday rolled around.
In the morning I was really dragging and I missed breakfast. However, I
saved that Surge cola all week and I felt that the time was ripe for it.
You'd be surprised by the amount of energy a Surge cola and a Twinkie for
breakfast can give you. Friday morning both of Mr. Nick's performance classes
met at the auditorium. We set up the stage and practiced the songs several
times. For the blacklight song we used Kathy Trocoli's "Light Your
World". The lead was a giant pink candle, and the backgrounds all
used large candles of various colors. We all wore black, and with all the
lights turned off and the blacklights turned on, all the audience could
see was the candles. We performed in front of the stage. Also, off to either
side puppeteers wearing white gloves sang the song in sign language. The
effect was hands floating in mid-air. The other song was Carmen's "Great
God". The song has kind of a military sound to it. So the background
singers did a kind of marching choreography on the top tier of the stage,
while the band played on the bottom tier. This was done in normal lighting.
That night the conference ended and a few teams left. Most waited until
the next morning, though, before going home. It was kind of sad. I mean,
you make friends real easy at the conference because here is probably the
only place where you would find other people that do the same ministry
that you do. Christian puppet ministries are rather rare. Well, everyone
made their farewells and promised to come back next year. Friday night
after the evening performances a lot of hugs were given. Well, the week
is over and much has been done. Reluctantly, we made our way home in the
Frasher-mobile. THE END
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