Straight Up With a Twist!

Since this is our first issue of this magazine, I would like to explain what Straight Up With a Twist is all about. This part of the magazine was designed to add some humor to everyday life, which I think most of us could use! It is not meant to be taken seriuosly, but if you are looking for some good advice Straight Up may be a good place to look. If you have any questions or comments I would love to hear from you. I hope you enjoy the article. Here are some charms from the South, southern phrases, and some southern terminology that I thought you might find interesting. (Not necessarily used by normal people nowadays)

Funny Southern Terms

Actin' Bar - Low tree limb used as a toilet seat
Cooter - Turtle
Risin' - A boil, swelling inflammation
Twinkles - Pine needles
Shed - An out building
Har - Covers baldness
Table muscle - Pot belly
Whomper-jawed - Uneven
Lunk haid - Dumb
Gully Washer - Hard Rain
Bust the wind - (This one's self explanatory!)

Southern Expressions

Busy as a bumblebee in a bucket of tar!

Happy as a full hog in a mudhole!

Broad as a bard

Ugly as a mud fence

Fat as a tub of lard

Soft as a baby's bottom

Pretty as a speckled pup

Southern Charms

(It's not our fault if you believe these!)

It is said that if you carry a small old potato it will relieve arthritis
Carry a button you have found in your pocket and it is said to bring you good luck.
Wear your birthstone for luck
You will have good luck if you carry your wisdom tooth in your pocket
Carry a lock of your lover's hair and he/she will always be true to you (Yeah, if the heads attached!)
Carry salt in your pocket and you will always be happy!

(Portions of this article have been obtained for information from Speaking Southern by Nick and William Powers)